"Don't Hire Me, Write the Content Yourself"
(a micro film script)

INT. YOUR OFFICE. MID-MORNING. MID-ZOOM.

YOU

(tetchy)

Look, we don't have time to brief a copywriter.

It'll delay things.

ME (ON-SCREEN)

What will delay things,

is you trying to write the content yourself.

YOU

(eye-roll)

How hard can it be? You creatives like to believe

it's some sort of dark art...

ME

(strokes chin)

Well, it does require a special set of skills

YOU

You're Liam Neeson now?

Just an exceptionally gifted & modest

copywriter here to help.

YOU

Save it.

After this call, I'll get cracking on it myself

ME

Knock yourself out.

YOU

(supremely confident)

I've allocated two hours for it.

ME

Triple it.

And that's just you tinkering with an opening para.

Think of what else you could be doing,

while I'm writing the words?

YOU

(still defiant)

How can a mere copywriter get up close & personal

with our brand and tone-of-voice overnight?

It's what I do. Been at it for 20+ years and rarely

go beyond a first draft, just sayin'...

YOU

(killer plot twist)

But I don't have the budget for a copywriter.

(expected that, gathers)

Do you have the budget for a physio who'll be

digging knots out of your back from hunching

over your laptop trying to write this beast yourself?

YOU, UNCONSCIOUSLY RELAXING YOUR SHOULDERS

(seizes the moment)

So eh, want to give me a verbal brief, now?

I can get cracking soon as we finish this call...

YOU

(a sudden rush of emotion)

You're a life-saver Catherine.

I can sense this is the beginning of a

beautiful client-relationship.

Let's put a pin in that for the

rom-com version, okay?

FADE OUT ON:

ME, TAKING NOTES - YOU, DELIRIOUSLY HAPPY

AT GETTING THIS OFF YOUR DESK, AND ONTO MINE.

"Don't Hire Me, Write the Content Yourself" (a micro film script)

YOU